In which an ex-employee of a Swiss bank offers to set Gilbert up as the next of kin to a deceased Yugoslavian oil trader, and to transfer the dead man’s money into his bank account... at a price, of course. Will the scammer accept Gilbert’s generous offer of free membership to his introduction agency? And if so, what sort of partner will Gilbert be able to find for the scammer?

Cast of characters

Gilbert Murray – proprietor of the Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency.
Ronald Knight – the aggrieved son of one of Gilbert’s late clients.
Adrian Muster – allegedly an ex-Investment Manager of the Banca Unione di Credito in Switzerland.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Investment opportunity

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2023 09:33:15 -0500

Hello,

The Banca Unione di Credito here in Switzerland is one of the largest Swiss banks licensed to operate private banking in Switzerland.

My name is Adrian Muster; and I used to work at the Banca Unione di Credito in Switzerland.

As an Investment Manager with the bank, I have handled a lot of secret, tax free investments offshore, which are not traceable for our numerous international private clients, which include Americans, Africans and Asians in line with their instructions. Because of the secrets and personal nature of these investments, we must work one on one with the clients to ensure full confidentiality.

The real purpose for contacting you is that I have a very small proposition and I need your co-operation.

Eight years ago a client I worked with, a Mr John de Balint, a Yugoslavian oil trader with Yukos Oil in Russia, invested a lot of money in four different time deposit accounts, each for a four year period in our offshore bank in the Cayman Islands.

Before the maturity of these investments, the bank was informed by the police of his death in an oilrig explosion.

At the time of his death he left a will and the will stated that his only son (who is in jail in Sri Lanka for drug offences on a 25 year sentence) was the only beneficiary to all his assets. Legally, the son cannot make the claim, so there is no next of kin to claim the funds.

The funds have been dormant for the last 36 months and by the instructions here at our Switzerland head office, it will be declared unclaimed by the bank very soon.

I just retired from the bank and I have spoken to Mr John de Balint’s son about this proposal also. I am therefore compelled to seek your co-operation to salvage the investments for the son and the rest for the both of us. I have decided to contact you and provide you with the necessary documents and assistance so you can claim the funds as the next of kin to Mr John de Balint.

The son will also be confirming your identity to the bank as a known person to him, and the funds will be transferred to you, because he cannot claim it himself as the law forbids anyone currently associated with such criminal charges to make such a claim, and if these funds are not claimed soon; they will be deposited into the Swiss treasury as unclaimed funds. If this happens, no one can make claim to the money again.

You will have to hold 80% in lieu for the son and the balance can be shared between us based on our agreement.

Please respond immediately via any of my secure email addresses indicating your interest or otherwise, and more details and relevant documents that will help you understand my proposition and how to proceed.

adrian.muster@lugano.com

I am looking forward to your response and co-operation.

Respectfully,

Adrian Muster

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Regarding your interesting email

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2023 09:44:37

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read the most interesting email that you sent me, regarding the funds of your deceased client, Mr John de Balint.

I have to say, Mr Muster, I was intrigued by your email, and by the proposition you put forward. I am a businessman, and I am currently on the lookout for funds to enable me to expand my business. It sounds as if your proposition could provide me with the funds I am looking for.

I am extremely interested in finding out some more details. Exactly how much money are we talking about here?

Please get back to me with more details as soon as you can.

I look forward to your positive response.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Business opportunity

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2023 08:42:29 -0400

Dear friend,

Thank you for the email response to my proposal.

I will like to put you through all the steps to make this deal conclusive and successful for all of us. I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I would like to confide and trust in you as the success of this deal is very crucial.

One thing I will like you to do is to keep in touch regularly and respond to all my emails within 24 to 36 hours, or else I will conclude that you are no longer interested in helping me claim the funds.

When Mr John de Balint died, his accounts (four accounts) were added to a list of dormant accounts here in Switzerland. These accounts were viewed as dormant after three years when his only son, who is serving a life imprisonment term in Sri Lanka for drug trafficking, was not deemed responsible enough to place the claim. He (the son) has the accounts in question under the management of a group of financial advisors, who can only manage the funds with the bank, but they cannot move it from the bank.

Mr John de Balint’s son does not want to give the advisors access to his father’s wealth. As I told you, he is serving life imprisonment and with this knowledge, the financial advisors are prone to mismanage his father’s assets in his absence.

The database where this account was added can be accessed at https://www.crt-ii.org/search.phtm. The deceased account holder’s name or surname or both together can be used as the search criteria on this database.

As of the time of Mr John de Balint’s death, I worked at the Zurich branch of Banca Unione di Credito, before I was transferred to the Geneva branch. A few years after the transfer, I was retired.

I have some access to some of Mr John de Balint’s information from the bank files and these might come in relevant later with regards to the claim of the accounts.

I also have the original copy of the deceased’s death certificate, which was provided to me by the deceased’s son’s attorney, after my visit to him in the Sri Lankan prison. He has agreed with my proposal as I put it to you and that is why I contacted you and I am looking for a reliable partner.

The total sum held in the term deposits, plus interest, amounts to $80.25 million (US currency). Eighty percent (80%) of this will be for the son and the other twenty percent (20%) will be for the both of us to share. I offer you five percent (5%) and I will take fifteen percent (15%). This is however negotiable on further discussion.

I have already given Mr Balint’s son an upfront guarantee of $100,000 for the release of the death certificate to me by his attorneys, which will be required when claiming Mr Balint’s assets as the next of kin.

The next step to proceed is to fill out the necessary claim forms and also get an attorney to represent all legal matters at the bank. I am suggesting that 50% of the attorney’s fees be paid by my humble self and the other 50% by you. I don’t have too much on me as of the moment and this is why I suggest this. A good attorney here in Switzerland costs at least 2,600 euros. I will make more inference to this after your consent is given to proceed as I planned.

Not to worry, the bank will not ask you for your relation to the deceased, but they will contact the son and confirm your identity and also inform him of the claim being placed on his father’s accounts. On your agreement, I will proceed to release all necessary forms that will be required for you to fill out and also all other necessary documents.

If you are OK with all these proceeds and wish to continue, or if you wish not to continue, please do inform me. I have to get all these documents ready, meet with the respective attorneys and also make the trip to Sri Lanka soon, so I need to know.

I request strict confidentiality from you on this matter and I will be very humbly obliged if you did not provide any information on this deal to anyone.

Kindly respond with 24 to 36 hours if you are interested in proceeding or not. If I do not get a response from you by then, I will cease from contacting you again.

Best regards,

Adrian

The website mentioned by Mr Muster is the official website for the Claims Resolution Tribunal of the Holocaust Victim Assets Litigation against Swiss Banks and other Swiss Entities, which is responsible for processing claims relating to assets deposited in Swiss banks by victims of Nazi persecution prior to and during the Second World War. It therefore has nothing whatsoever to do with recently-deceased Yugoslavian oil traders.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Please reassure me on one point

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2023 16:25:07

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your prompt response to my email, and for sending me the further information that I requested regarding your proposal.

Now that I know how much money we are talking about, I can confirm that I am definitely interested in pursuing this matter further: I calculate that the 5% you are offering me will work out at more than $4 million, which is more than enough to fund the expansion of my business that I am currently planning.

However, before we go any further, I would appreciate it if you could reassure me on one point: is this all legal and above-board? You mentioned that the late Mr de Balint’s son is currently serving time in jail for drug trafficking offences. This money doesn’t have any connection with drugs, does it? I ask because I am surprised that a simple oil trader has managed to accumulate such immense wealth via legal means.

I trust that you can appreciate the reason for my concern: I may only run a small business, but I am well-respected in my community and I have my reputation to consider. The last thing I want to do is to get mixed up in anything illegal, especially if drug money is involved.

If you are able to reassure me on this one point, Mr Muster, I will be happy to move forward with your business proposal.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Please reassure me on one point

Sent: Thu, 12 May 2023 04:11:14 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am very glad that you would like to help with the claim of the assets of Mr de Balint.

As you have calculated, the share of the money I offer for your help will run up to about $4.1 million (US currency).

Also, you have asked if Mr de Balint’s assets were gotten illegally or from drugs. The answer is no! Mr de Balint’s oil trading activities were very separate from his son’s dealings.

I guess you know these days that most young individuals are into drugs; both its usage and marketing. You would notice that most children from wealthy families have such tendencies. Mr de Balint’s son never had any access to his father’s accounts and he never made any deposits there to infer that his father was involved in any of his dealings.

All of Mr de Balint’s assets (at least those I know of that are held in Switzerland), were obtained from oil trade and also time deposit investments on the profits from his trades.

I was his Investment Portfolio Manager for a few years at the Zurich branch of the bank and I have never seen any suspicious movements or deposits of funds.

I know you are concerned about your reputation, but my friend, think about what difference your share of this money can make for both your reputation and your business.

What line of business are you into anyway?

I hope we can proceed with the proposal and start processing the claim of the assets. There is a lot of work that needs to be done.

As soon as I get confirmation/consent from you, I will make meetings with some attorneys I see best to handle the case, so I can discuss the case with them and find out how much they want to be paid for the job.

Kindly respond within 36 to 48 hours and let me know what you would like to do.

Respectfully,

Adrian M

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for your reassurance

Sent: Thu, 12 May 2023 14:05:58

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for reassuring me on the matter of the legality of the business transaction you are proposing. I am extremely relieved to hear that there is nothing untoward about this transaction, and that the late Mr de Balint’s fortune has no link whatsoever to the drugs trade.

On the subject of drugs, I must admit that I do feel somewhat uncomfortable with the idea that in going ahead with this transaction, I will be aiding and abetting a convicted drugs smuggler. I am of course referring to Mr de Balint’s wayward son. If I understand things correctly, the young Mr de Balint stands to do very well indeed out of this transaction. In fact, once he is released from prison, he will be rich beyond the wildest dreams of most men. This seems wrong to me, somehow. I cannot help but feel that if I move forward with this transaction, I will be condoning the evil acts that Mr de Balint Jnr has committed. Surely your conscience must be pricking you in a similar manner, Mr Muster?

Even though Mr de Balint Jnr is serving a long sentence for his crimes, a mere twenty-five years’ imprisonment is not nearly punishment enough, if you ask me. Drugs are the bane of modern society, and in my opinion, convicted drugs smugglers should have their testicles cut off and their eyes put out, after which they should be imprisoned for the rest of their miserable little lives on a desolate, swampy, mosquito-infested island. That would teach them a lesson. I am sure you would agree, Mr Muster.

Anyway, back to this transaction. Now that you have convinced me that there is nothing untoward about this business, I am happy to move forward. What is our next step?

Incidentally, Mr Muster, you asked what line of business I am in. I own and run the Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency, a regional concern with over 600 clients on our books. I live in a very remote, rural area of the United Kingdom, and a large proportion of the population around here lives in relative isolation, in small cottages, farms and hamlets, which can make it rather difficult when it comes to finding the ideal partner. The Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency has an excellent record in matching and bringing together like-minded people, for friendship, companionship and romance. We pride ourselves on our service, our professionalism, our confidentiality and our integrity. Much like you Swiss bankers, no doubt.

I have been running the agency for the past fifteen years, and I am now keen to expand beyond the immediate area and turn it into a national agency. Obviously, this will cost a considerable amount of money, and this is why your business proposal caught my eye the other day.

I must go now: I have to interview a prospective new client. Please get back to me as soon as you can with details of our next step.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Thank you for your reassurance

Sent: Fri, 13 May 2023 08:11:31 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I understand how you feel about people who deal in drugs and I think they are the ones that bring ruin to our society.

But there is one thing I want you to be convinced about. We are not claiming this money for reasons that are morally degrading. If the funds in question belong to Mr de Balint Jnr and we knew the money was gotten from drugs, then we will be committing an offence that I think our conscience will not let pass. The funds belong to the father and I am sure we would both know that the son deserves more than he is getting.

Well anyway, I think we both stand a chance to gain more from this than the son would imagine. He (the son) is used to his father’s immense wealth and getting this money in his hands does not change any fact to him. He will still be able to get it one time or the other when he gets out. All he has to do is to appoint some financial managers to take care of the money till he gets out.

Although it will not be the best of ideas (as there is the tendency for the advisers to mismanage the assets), but I am sure he would do it if that is what it takes to keep his father’s assets.

My idea is “let us be his financial advisors till he has the chance to have this money for himself”.

The funds will still be in my possession after the claim for a period of years and I am thinking about also investing it, and when the time is right for Mr de Balint Jnr to claim his money from me, I will deduct my share and also the profits on top of it all. It’s something I have had time to think about and I am sure it is the best retirement plan anyone could ask for.

What you would need to do to proceed is to click on the link below:

www.mail.yahoo.com

Log onto the following Yahoo email account with the following details:

Username: adrian_muster45

Password: player81

There are two emails in the inbox with some attached files.

Download these attached files in both case, ie forms and sample forms, and print them out and fill out the original forms according to the sample forms provided. After you have done this, please notify me.

I will be meeting with some attorneys on Monday to discuss with them and I will let you know how much they want us to pay for their services.

I will keep in touch. Please do the same and let me know when you have the forms.

Best regards,

Adrian

Page 1 of the scammer’s form
(Click to enlarge)

Page 2 of the scammer’s form
(Click to enlarge)

Page 3 of the scammer’s form
(Click to enlarge)

Page 1 of the scammer’s sample form
(Click to enlarge)

Page 2 of the scammer’s sample form
(Click to enlarge)

Page 3 of the scammer’s sample form
(Click to enlarge)

Fortunately for Gilbert – and unfortunately for Mr Muster – the password he has given Gilbert turns out to be the same one he uses to access his scamming account, so Gilbert now has full access to this scammer’s email account. So, it’s time to play. To start off with, Gilbert has added an automatic signature to Mr Muster’s email preferences. This signature, which will be added to all of Mr Muster’s future emails, reads “PS. I am ashamed to say that I have an extremely small penis”. Let’s see how long it is before Mr Muster notices this... and whether he knows how to turn it off.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I will cast my eyes over these documents this weekend

Sent: Fri, 13 May 2023 14:38:37

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for informing me of the location of the documents I need to complete. I am rather busy this weekend with work, but I will cast my eyes over the documents this weekend and get back to you next week.

I must admit, I am still rather unsure as to how I feel about the moral side of this transaction. After all is said and done, the evil Mr de Balint Jnr will still end up with millions of dollars in his hands, and that will be partly thanks to us. As a drug smuggler, Mr de Balint Jnr should be castrated, blinded and exiled to a remote island with no hope of release, not handed millions of dollars on a plate. I shall wrestle with my conscience over the weekend and see if I can justify this in my own mind.

I trust you will have a pleasant weekend. Tell me, Mr Muster, do you have anything nice planned for Saturday and Sunday?

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I will cast my eyes over these documents this weekend

Sent: Sat, 14 May 2023 16:41:16 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I have to say that I do not think that Mr de Balint Jnr should be treated as royalty for what he has done, but I guess we have to overlook some facts and make it work in our favour.

I hope you can get the forms soon and have a look at them and I will proceed to give further instructions.

I have met with some attorneys and I have discussed with them with regards to representing us with regards to the claim of the assets. The claims process should take about two to three weeks and they will be required to work full time. They are asking for full payment upfront and they ask to be paid 2,850 Euros for the full time services.

Will you be able to handle 50% payment of these fees and I will handle the rest? Let me know how much you can afford.

I also still have other documents that you will require to attach to the claim forms while sending them to the bank.

I don’t have anything planned for this weekend and all I can do right now is to keep making plans and also making plans for the week to come.

I will wait on your response with regards to the forms when you are less busy.

Thank you for all the support on this and I hope we will be able to make some progress next week. I will keep in touch, kindly do the same.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: These forms are in some foreign language

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2023 10:18:21

Dear Mr Muster,

I trust that you enjoyed your weekend, my dear fellow. I spent this weekend wrestling with my conscience over the somewhat dubious morality of this situation. After much consideration, I can tell you that I am prepared to move forward with this transaction, but only on the strict understanding that I will not have to come into contact with the felonious Mr de Balint Jnr.

I cannot abide criminal types, and if I were to meet Mr de Balint Jnr in person, I am afraid that I would not be able to stop myself from telling him to his face that in my opinion, his gonads should be removed with a blunt knife, his eyes should be plucked from his face with a dirty spoon, and he should be forced to spend the rest of his miserable existence on a disease-infested island in the middle of nowhere.

I am sure that this would not do much to aid the smooth progress of this transaction, so I would like you to reassure me that I shall not have to be in contact with Mr de Balint Jnr at any stage in this business. Once I have this reassurance, I will be happy to move forward.

Now then, those forms you told me about. I downloaded the forms this weekend, but I’m afraid I’m having some difficulty understanding them: they appear to be in German or some other foreign language.

Languages have never been my forte, Mr Muster. Do you have any English forms that I could fill in?

Incidentally, as you are doing me a favour, I was wondering if I could do you one in return, Mr Muster. You have not told me your marital status, but by the way you express yourself in your emails, I am assuming that you are single. As a token of my gratitude towards you for introducing me to this great opportunity, I would like to offer you free membership of my introduction agency.

What do you say, Mr Muster? I always say that the perfect woman is out there somewhere. With the help of my agency, you may well be able to find her. We have a large number of eligible women on our books at the moment. One of them could be your ideal partner.

Do let me know about the forms as soon as you can, and whether you would be interested in the free membership to my agency that I am offering you. I look forward to hearing from you by return.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: These forms are in some foreign language

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2023 14:34:01 +0200

Dear Lady Agatha,

Thank you for the email and comment.

I have noticed this most embarrassing postscript on my email account. I think it is probably a practical joke from one of these ridiculous spam emails that are sent to my email address daily.

I have changed my email address to admu@safe-mail.net for communication security reasons. Please do kindly send me emails through this address only. Thank you for understanding.

I hope you can overlook this and we could proceed with our business.

The forms which I sent over are in German and they are in the local language spoken in most of Switzerland. The forms are not currently available in any other languages and this is one of the reasons why I attached a sample of what the completed forms should look like, so you will know the areas to fill out and what to fill out there.

I want you to fill out your details and mark the appropriate areas on the originals as I have done for the example of “J. Smith”. It’s really quite simple.

Let me know if you can get this done, or you need further assistance.

On the other hand, you will not be coming into contact with Mr de Balint Jnr in person. All meetings with Mr de Balint Jnr will be between him and the attorneys and not you in person. I assure you of this.

I understand the way you feel about things, but as I said earlier; you might have to push aside any personal feelings so we can see this deal through and also for the benefit of both of us.

I am not married (actually divorced) and I don’t know if I will like to get married again. Anyway, I accept the membership to your introductory “dating” agency. As you said, no one knows what could happen.

Do give me a feedback with regards to the forms soon, as we still have other documents that I will like you to look through before the forms are sent back to the bank.

Thank you for the email and I hope to hear from you soon.

Do have a nice day.

Best regards,

Adrian

Mr Muster may have changed his email account, but luckily he has been foolish enough to use the same password, so Gilbert has full access to his new account too. “Lady Agatha” (another scambuster who is toying with Mr Muster at the same time as Gilbert) has obviously received an email which included Mr Muster’s embarrassing automatic signature. The scammer seems to be getting rather confused by it all: he is now addressing emails to the wrong people.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Who is “Lady Agatha”?

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2023 14:06:36

Dear Mr Muster,

I have to say, my dear fellow, I was greatly confused by your last email. Firstly, what is this “most embarrassing postscript” to which you referred? And secondly, who is this “Lady Agatha” to whom you addressed your last email to me?

Have you got me confused with someone else, Mr Muster? Please explain what is going on. I thought this business was entirely between you and I. In fact to quote you, you told me last week that you “request strict confidentiality from you (me) on this matter and I (you) will be very humbly obliged if you (I) did not provide any information on this deal to anyone”. But now you are addressing me as someone else entirely.

What is going on, Mr Muster? You haven’t involved someone else in this business without telling me, have you? Who is this shady “Lady Agatha” character?

I expect an explanation from you immediately, Mr Muster. I have already told you that my reputation is extremely important to me, so confidentiality in this matter is as important to me as it is to you.

Kindly get back to me at once.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Who is “Lady Agatha”?

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2023 15:21:21 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am sorry about addressing you as “Lady Agatha”.

Lady Agatha is helping me out with regards to the strange virus that has recently infected my computer and emails. I have to scan all my emails before I send them. I emailed her just before I emailed you.

I know that you are concerned about your reputation. So am I. This is why I have to be extra careful with this virus that has infected my computer.

I hope there is no offence taken. I only copied some extract from the email I sent her with regards to informing you of the virus, but I did not know that I copied her name with that section of the email also.

This is the first and last time it will happen. I have to be on my toes, as I think someone is trying to spy on me and extracting information from my computer.

There is a “read request” attached with this email. Kindly acknowledge it for security reasons.

I hope we can proceed as planned soon. Do you have all the forms and have you completed them as instructed?

Let me know and we can move on to the next phase. I sincerely apologise for the mistake in identity.

Respectfully,

Adrian M

Thanks to the automatic signature that Gilbert added to Mr Muster’s old email account, Mr Muster now thinks that his computer is infected with a virus. To increase his paranoia, Gilbert has now added the same offensive automatic signature to Mr Muster’s new email account.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I hope you haven’t passed this virus on to my computer

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2023 09:09:41

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read your latest email. To be quite frank, Mr Muster, I found it quite disturbing. You didn’t tell me that your computer was infected with some kind of virus. I hope you haven’t passed this virus on to my computer, Mr Muster. That would be terribly inconvenient: all the records for my introduction agency are stored on this computer, so a virus on the machine could be devastating to my business.

I am very worried about this, Mr Muster. Tell me, what effect is the virus having on your computer? You must tell me at once so that I can check to see if my own computer is similarly affected. This is not good news. Not good news at all.

And now, on top of this, you are telling me that you think someone is spying on you and extracting information from your computer! How can this be? Do you think someone else has found out about our little business deal? Have you mentioned it to someone else? How else can your no doubt tight security have been breached?

When sensitive, business-critical information like this is at stake, this kind of carry on will not do at all. It is extremely worrying.

Now then, Mr Muster, regarding those forms. I am still having trouble working out how to fill them in. If only they were in English, it would be so much easier. I would very much appreciate your help in filling them in. If you could advise me exactly what to write where, that would be a big help. I know how important legal documents like these can be, so I am keen not to make any mistakes.

Also on the subject of forms, now that you have accepted my offer of free membership to my introduction agency, I have attached the initial questionnaire for you to fill in. The form is quite self-explanatory – unlike those German forms you are expecting me to complete – so it shouldn’t take you more than a few minutes to fill in the form.

Please follow the instructions on the form precisely. The questions have been carefully designed to give us an initial idea of the sort of person you are looking for. With so many people on my agency’s books, your answers will enable us to identify the people with whom you will be most compatible. Once we have established that, we can start to narrow down the list of potential partners further.

Please print out and fill in the form, then scan it in and send it back to me as soon as you can. I can then enter your preferences into my computer and begin the process of finding you your perfect match.

I look forward to receiving the completed form by return, along with some advice on how to fill in those German forms you sent me.

Also, I must insist that you get back to me immediately with details of what that virus is doing to your computer, so that I can check whether my own computer is infected too. Perhaps you should consider purchasing some up to date virus-scanning software, Mr Muster.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

Gilbert’s introduction agency questionnaire
(Click to enlarge)

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Email was received

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2023 16:50:01 +0200

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I would like you to know that I have quarantined the virus on my computer and I have had time to retrieve most of my files which I thought were lost. The only thing this type of virus does is to extract data from your computer and transmit it to the computer that issued the virus.

Mr Murray, I have to tell you that I scanned all files including emails before I sent them off my computer. Not to worry, your ISP will inform you if this virus gets on your computer as they will notice it.

If you would be sending responses to me via email, I suggest you use the following email address for both our interests:

adrian_muster2002@yahoo.com

I have to tell you that being a Swiss banker, I suspect any little virus attack on my computer as very threatening and also very dangerous, as someone might be trying to get the information which I stored about my clients on my computer out of it and use it to commit identity theft, which could lead to an instance whereby the perpetrators will try and transfer funds from the clients’ account.

It has never happened to me while I was working for the bank, but I have heard stories. Not to worry, I have not stored any information about you on my computer.

Mr Murray, it seems that you get worried easily. I had noticed this from the onset of communications with you. I will like you to please be more relaxed. I know you are worried about your reputation, but I am worried about mine too.

About the forms, it’s quite simple. Do you have the sample forms? If you do, just fill out the originals as the samples were filled out. I would have hoped to get the forms in English, but for now this is not possible. We will just have to make do with this one.

On the first page (ie sample form 1), mark “Herr” (meaning Mr), then fill in your name and surname and date of birth. On the line below that comes your full residential address and phone number. Where I marked “USA”, you should mark your current country of residence. On line 4, you mark the “X”’s where I have marked them. Make sure you don’t mark an “X” on anywhere else other than where specified, or the forms will be voided by the bank.

On the second form (with reference to sample form 2), on the row labelled “6” all you do is to mark an “X” and exactly where it has been done and write “USD” beside it. This is to inform the bank that you would like to claim the funds in US dollars.

On the third form, you mark an “X” on yellownet, on the row labelled “12”, and under this, you date and sign the form.

The rest of the spaces that were left behind are meant for official use at the bank, so please do not fill out any more than I have told you to.

If you would be sending responses to me via email, I suggest you use the following email address for both our interests:

adrian_muster2002@yahoo.com

Let me know if you have been able to fill out the forms as I have specified. I still have some other documents that you will be required to fill out, attach and send to the bank with the claim forms.

Also, with regards to the questionnaire you attached to the email, I will take a look at it and fill it out soon. But right now, I think it will be business before pleasure.

Kindly get back to me soon.

Regards,

Adrian

Mr Muster has now opened a third email account in an attempt to shake off the “virus” he thinks has infected his computer. Unfortunately, he has had the good sense to use a different password for this new account, so Gilbert cannot access it. However, Gilbert has helpfully closed down Mr Muster’s two old email accounts for him. Let’s see if we can make him believe that there are problems with this new email account too...

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Will you please stop changing your email address?

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2023 16:52:57

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just received your latest email. Will you please stop changing your email address? I am beginning to lose count of the number of email addresses you have had over the past few days, and I am starting to get extremely confused about which one I should use when emailing you. For example, your last email came from one address, yet you advised me to reply to a completely different one. What on earth is going on over there?

Thank you for your reassurance about this virus that has infected your computer. You ought to be more careful with things like that, my dear fellow, especially when you are dealing with sensitive information.

Regarding these forms, thank you for the additional information. I will take a look at them tonight and see if I can make sense of them.

I am glad to hear that you received the questionnaire safely. Between you and I, Mr Muster, the sooner you can fill it in, the better: I have just enrolled a couple of new female members to the introduction agency today, and I can tell you that they are a pair of absolute stunners. The sooner I get your initial questionnaire back to me, the sooner I will be able to run your details through the computer and see if you match up with either of these new members. I really shouldn’t say this, but seeing as you are doing me such a big favour, I may be able to “tweak” the results a little to ensure that your details match up. Get the form back to me in the next couple of days and I will see what I can do before someone else snaps them up.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I was rather bemused by the postscript you added to the end of your last email, in which you apologised for the modest size of your genitalia. I know that you are enrolling in my introduction agency, but to be frank Mr Muster, this really is more information than I need – or want – to know at this stage. This level of detail isn’t normally required unless one of your potential partners requests it specifically. Kindly act with a touch more decorum, my dear fellow.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re : Will you please stop changing your email address

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2023 21:04:02 +0200

NOTE: THERE ARE FILES ATTACHED WITH THIS EMAIL. KINDLY DOWNLOAD AND PRINT OUT.

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am sorry that I have to change email addresses so frequently, but it is to make sure that our communication remains secure.

Using only one email address to transmit all emails is not very safe, especially with the documents which I have to send over to you by email.

Mr Murray, I will like you to take a look at the forms as soon as you can, as I would like us to proceed to a considerable extent before the end of this week.

As of the moment, the most important issue we have to face right now is claiming these assets at the bank. After the claim process, you can register a new bank account in your country, or you can apply to open an account here in Switzerland, to avoid suspicion and also all taxes that might follow if your share is transferred to your country. Taxation in Switzerland are the lowest you can find anywhere.

I have attached a copy of Mr de Balint’s original death certificate. Please print these out. All the completed forms should be sent back to the bank directly at the following address:

Banca Unione di Credito, Piazza Dante 7, PO Box 2861, CH 6901 Lugano, Schweiz, Switzerland

I will attach and send to you a power of attorney form, which you will have to fill accordingly and send back to the bank with the completed claim forms and the death certificate. I will give you the name of the law firm that I have met with to represent “us” later tomorrow after I have finalised meetings with them.

Kindly also make a copy of your passport or driver’s licence and include it with the completed forms and power of attorney when sending back to the bank.

The lawyers will handle everything on your behalf with the bank and I will provide them with all necessary documents that they might require on the deceased, or that the bank might request. Let me know if you have any comments.

Keep in touch regularly.

Regards,

Adrian Muster

NOTE: THERE ARE FILES ATTACHED WITH THIS EMAIL. KINDLY DOWNLOAD AND PRINT OUT.

The blank power of attorney
(Click to enlarge)

The first page of an indecipherable certificate
(Click to enlarge)

The second page of an indecipherable certificate
(Click to enlarge)

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: You’re confusing me now

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2023 12:33:39

Dear Mr Muster,

I have to say, Mr Muster, you’re starting to confuse me with all these documents you keep sending me. I’m beginning to feel a little overwhelmed by it all. After all, I am but a simple country introduction agency proprietor.

Why have you sent me a blank power of attorney? And what is that other document all about? I can’t make that out at all.

I suggest that to avoid any further confusion, we deal with these documents one at a time. Let us start with that three-page German document you sent me last week.

I have re-examined the document in light of the advice you gave me yesterday, and I am now fairly sure that I will be able to fill in the document accurately. However, as the document is in German and I know slightly less German than I know Serbo-Croat, I don’t actually know what it is that you want me to sign.

Welsby, the lawyer I have used for the past ten years or more, has always advised me never to sign anything unless I am absolutely sure that I know what I am signing. I could be signing up for anything by putting my name to this document: for all I know, I could be agreeing to sign over my life savings to someone, or to hand over my first-born son into slavery.

Admittedly, these are somewhat extreme examples, but I presume that you get my point. You do hear of things like this happening, and I always feel that it is better to be safe than to be sorry. With this in mind, I cannot sign this document until I know exactly what it says. Therefore, I would appreciate it if you could provide me with a line-by-line translation of the document, for my peace of mind. As you obviously have some considerable skill at languages, I presume this will not be too much trouble for you.

As soon as I receive the translation from you, I will be happy to sign the document, and then we can move forward.

As you are keen as I am to move forward with this transaction, I look forward to receiving the translation from you later today.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: You’re confusing me now

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2023 16:39:57 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I would like you to kindly understand that this matter is not as complicated as you put it.

I think I understand the problem, but I would like you to know that there must be trust between the two of us. If I did not trust you, I would not have contacted you or even have gone this far with you in this proposal. Mr Murray, you have to learn how to trust my word from this moment onwards.

For one, I know you obviously trust me to an extent, or else we would not have gotten to this stage. I am sure you are as eager to close this deal as I am. I know that you are concerned about your reputation and your security. I am also concerned about mine too.

Well, with regards to the claim forms, form 1:

The first section, labelled “Konto/Depotinheber”, is asking for the personal information about the claimant to the account.

The fourth section, labelled “Korrespondenzadresse”, requests if the address stated in the first line is your permanent address or temporary. As you will notice, I marked permanent address with the “X”. The other “X” on that same line, which as you can see is marked on the box for “E”, states that your primary language is English. The bank will transmit all further correspondences to you (if necessary) in English.

On the second page of the claim form, you can see the section marked “6 Angabenzur Eroffnung Gelbes Konto”. This section requests that you fill in the currency of the account on which the claim is made. This is the only thing you fill out on this page. The other sections will be completed by the bank officials during the claim of the assets.

On the third form, the section “12 Weitere Zusatzdienstleistungen” is requesting if you would like the bank to appoint an attorney on your behalf. You are to put an “X” on yellownet, which means no, as you will be appointing your own attorneys.

This is where the blank power of attorney form which I sent over to you yesterday comes in. If you read through the power of attorney form, you will notice that you will be requested to fill in your name and also the name of the deceased account holder and also the name of the attorneys that will be representing you in the claim.

The other two documents I sent over are the copies of the original death certificate of Mr John de Balint.

All the completed forms and the completed power of attorney, and also printed copies of the death certificate, have to be sent back to the bank for processing. I hope you saved the bank address which I included in the email which I sent yesterday? Please do save it: it would be of reference later on while sending the forms back.

One thing I will like you to note from this point on is that you have to trust my word if we are going to get the transaction done successfully.

I am sure if you really believed that I would be trying to steal your money or “sell your first born into slavery”, you would not have replied to my email.

I have concluded with the attorneys that I have selected to represent the case (claim) with the bank. They are asking for 2,850 Euros for the job. Can you pay the whole 2,850 Euros, or shall we split the fees 50% both ways and I pay 50% and you handle 50%? The reason why I ask is that I am a little short of cash and it might take me some time to get that type of cash on short demand.

As I told you in one of my previous emails, I had to give Mr de Balint Jnr $100,000 (guarantee) to get these attorneys to release the original death certificate to me, so we could use it to claim his father’s assets. So you could say that I have put in my life savings into this. That is why I want us to move on with it as quickly as possible.

I hope I have answered all unclear areas. Kindly get back to me soon.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for the explanation

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2023 17:25:50

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for your explanation regarding the German form you sent me. I am not quite sure that you needed to send me five different copies of the same email, but no doubt this is just an example of your thoroughness and diligence.

First of all, I would like to put your mind at rest over something. If I have given the impression that I don’t trust you, I must apologise profusely, as this is not the case at all. Of course I trust you, Mr Muster: after all, you Swiss bankers are renowned across the world for your trustworthiness and integrity. I wasn’t for one moment suggesting that I thought you might be asking me to sign away my life savings or sell my first-born son into slavery. I was simply sticking to the advice that my lawyer, Welsby, gave me many years ago: never to sign anything without understanding it completely beforehand. Welsby’s advice has always stood me in good stead, so I trust that you can appreciate the reason for my concerns.

Now that we have got that out of the way, I would like to turn to your explanation of the German form. While you have explained sections 1, 4, 6 and 12 (the sections I have to fill in) with admirable clarity, you have not explained the remaining sections of the form to me (2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11, ie the sections I do not have to fill in). Nor have you provided me with a translation of the two paragraphs that appear just above where I have to sign and date the form on the third page.

You have told me that these remaining sections “will be completed by the bank officials during the claim of the assets”. Seeing as my name will appear at the bottom of the form, I am keen to know precisely what these remaining sections will be used for.

Please therefore send me an explanation of these sections by return, along with a word-for-word translation of the two paragraphs immediately above the place where I sign and date the form. Once I have this information, I will be more than happy to proceed.

Regarding the death certificate you sent me, not only is this in a foreign language, but I can’t even make out the name of the deceased anywhere on the form. If I can’t pick his name out, what chance have the people at the bank got? I would appreciate it if you could point out where Mr de Balint’s name appears on the death certificate so that I can be satisfied in my own mind.

I must thank you for putting up with me and my concerns, Mr Muster. I know I can be a bit of a worrier at times, but I have always found that a little caution pays dividends in the end. Just like the Co-op used to do.

On the subject of forms, I note that you haven’t yet returned the questionnaire I sent you. It won’t take you more than a few moments to fill it in, so please do get it back to me as soon as you can, Mr Muster. I am keen to repay your kindness and consideration in this matter by doing all that I can to find you the ideal partner, but until you send that form back to me, I can’t make a start on that.

I look forward to hearing back from you with answers to my remaining queries – and with the completed questionnaire attached – either later today or early tomorrow.

Do have a pleasant evening, my dear fellow.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2023 16:02:15

Dear Mr Muster,

I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet, with an explanation of the remaining sections of that German form you sent me. I am keen to move forward with this transaction as speedily as possible. We have wasted a considerable amount of time thanks to that virus your computer contracted, and I am keen to press on and make this time up as much as possible.

Perhaps you do not quite appreciate the reason for my concern over this German document. Let me put it to you another way. Although you are obviously an educated man, it is a fairly safe assumption that you do not speak Cantonese. Put yourself in my shoes, Mr Muster: if someone was to hand you a form in Cantonese and ask you to sign it without first explaining precisely what the form said, would you be willing to sign it? I doubt it very much.

Let us waste no more time, Mr Muster. Let us press on with this business without delay. Send me the information I require by return so that we can move forward.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2023 17:51:00 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am very sorry that I have not been able to get in touch with you for the past few hours, but I have been a bit under the weather. I have been trying to recuperate and I just had enough sleep to help me through today. I have not been on my computer since yesterday.

I will brief you on the sections of the claim form which I left out during the interpretation on the other sections which you will be required to fill out. The sections I left out are those that will be for official use at the bank. I have put together the relevant interpretations and the reasons why the bank will be filling out these sections.

Please read:

“2 Agaben des Partners”: this section is meant for the information about your partner (ie wife or spouse) in the case that this is a joint claim. Kindly leave it blank. The bank will cancel this section out (if left blank), on reviewing the form.

“3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter”: in this section, you are meant to state the name and surname of the attorney that will be representing you. But as I just concluded meetings with the attorneys yesterday, I am yet to compile this information and send it over to you for this section and also for filling out the power of attorney. I will send it over later today.

“5 Bestehendes Konto bei Post Finance”: this will be for use at the bank. The bank will fill in the account number of the account being claimed and the account holder’s name and surname. Obviously, you don’t know the account number of the deceased, so you cannot fill this in.

“7 Karten zum Gelben Konto”: here the bank will provide more information in case the deceased had more than one account at the bank at the time of his death. In our case, three more account numbers will be filled in here, as I told you from the start that Mr de Balint held four accounts at the bank.

“8 Uberzugslimiten beim Gelben Konto”: in this section, the bank will most likely put an “X” on the CHF 1000. What this section is asking is how much is the total assets at the bank that is being claimed. “CHF 1000” means the assets are over one million Swiss Francs. As you know, I gave you a rough idea of Mr de Balint’s net assets to be $80.25 million (US currency); it might be more than this at the bank.

“9 Angaben zur Eroffnung Gelbes Deposito-Konto”: here the bank will be confirming your identity as stated on the form and they will do this by perhaps contacting Mr de Balint Jnr for confirmation. Also they will be confirming your attorney’s identity and after this has been done, they will fill in both your name and the attorney’s name in the first two lines. Afterwards, the forms will be stamped approved.

“11 Angaben zur Eroffnung eines Depots”: as before, all accounts which are present and under claim will be verified by the bank, to belong to Mr de Balint. Only account numbers will be stated, as in the bank’s records before the accounts were deemed dormant. This section will also be stamped approved, after they have been verified.

“12 Weitere Zusatzdienstleistugen”: this section is not relevant to the claim. It is only relevant if we were to be placing a claim on an account which is in investments and the investments had not matured before the claim was placed on the account.

I have interpreted this to the best of my abilities.

I will also be sending over the details for filling out of “3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter” on the German claim form and also for the power of attorney.

I will get back in touch with you later tonight if possible. I will like to rest a bit now, to avoid a breakdown of my body system.

Thank you for the email. I will be in touch soon.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Attorney Details

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2023 20:21:19 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

I have the information for the power of attorney form, as the attorneys have agreed to take on the job.

Details for filling out the power of attorney form:

Name of firm (representative): INSAD SA (Craig E Ihde)

Firm’s address: Schifflaende 12, 8010 Zurich, Switzerland

Name of account owner claimed: John de Balint

You will also be filling in the name “Craig Ihde” into the section “3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter” of the claim form.

I think you can do these and I will get back to you tomorrow with further instructions and details.

Keep in touch.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for your detailed explanation

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2023 12:02:43

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your emails, and for your detailed explanation regarding the remaining sections of the German claim form. The information you have provided has certainly helped to put my mind at rest.

However, I note that you have not yet provided me with an explanation of section 10 of the form (“Zusatzdienstleistungen zum Geben Deposito-Konto”), and that you have not yet provided me with a translation of the two short paragraphs that appear just above the place where I sign and date the form. I can only assume that this has been an oversight on your part, possibly caused by your current ill health (I do sincerely hope that you are feeling better now, by the way).

Please send me an explanation of section 10 and a translation of the two paragraphs in question by return, so that I can fill in the form.

I also raised an issue about the death certificate a few days ago. If you remember, I mentioned that no matter how hard I looked, I could not see Mr de Balint’s name anywhere on the form. Upon closer inspection, I have just been able to make out three dates on the form: 13 February 1832, 8 May 2023 and 21 October 1858.

Considering that Mr de Balint died only recently, are you sure you have sent me the correct document, Mr Muster? I can only assume that you have sent me the wrong document by mistake, as this doesn’t look anything like a recent death certificate to me. Please check your records carefully and send me the correct document by return.

How is your health today, Mr Muster? I do hope that you haven’t contracted that virus that was afflicting your computer. If you ask me, what you need is a good woman to look after you while you are ill. Take my advice, my dear fellow: raise yourself up from your sick bed, fill in that questionnaire I sent you and send it back to me straight away. I will then do all I can to find you the perfect partner, who will look after you for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, etc.

Do get back to me as soon as you can with the remaining information about the claim form and a copy Mr de Balint’s death certificate. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Thank you for your detailed explanation

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2023 13:32:05 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

You are a very inquisitive man and this intrigues me about you. I guess it comes with the business. In your line of business, I guess you have to do a lot of question asking and I understand.

Please don’t be offended by these words, but as you know I am not at the peak of my health. With regards to the questionnaire, I will fill it out and send it over when I am ready to meet someone, but at this point I am not really keen on starting anything with anyone. I understand your position in trying to help me find a suited partner, but I have to say that I guess I will like to be a bit spontaneous and I will like you to match my profile to anyone suitable and not anyone you think that I will like. Things always work better like that.

Back to business, I am sorry if I omitted any translations, but I guess I must have overlooked it.

The translation to section 10 of the form (“Zusatzdienstleistungen zum Geben Deposito-Konto”) is not really different from that of section 9. All the bank will be doing here is to repeat the steps taken in section 9, but here is where the approval and certifications of your identity and that of the attorney’s will be confirmed officially. As you will see in the forms, there are some small boxes on the bottom right hand corner. The bank will display all approvals here with the signature and stamp of an official at the bank, or maybe the bank seal will be imprinted here.

The two paragraphs above the signature line state that “The bank has the right to cancel any claim at the initial stages of the claim, if the bank is not satisfied that the claimant has met all requirements/filled out all relevant information required by the bank to process the claim on the account in question. If you are in agreement with this term, kindly indicate with your signature and date this form.”.

With regards to the document confirming the death of Mr de Balint, the document you have with you could be likened to what you call an official police report in your country.

As you know, Mr de Balint did not die in Switzerland and he was neither buried here either. He was buried in his home country, Yugoslavia.

This report was made for confirmation by the police who actually undertook an investigation to certify this. These dates, 13 February 1832, 8 May 2023 and 21 October 1858, are the dates when this document was passed into law in Switzerland at various cantons (states), ie Zurich, Geneva and Lugano.

This documentation is valid in these three cantons and we have a copy for certification purposes with the bank. This document was issued before the bank actually received a copy of Mr de Balint’s real death certificate, and I think the bank should have a copy of this too.

I hope this time I have answered all questions?!

Let me know if you got the information with regards to the power of attorney in the email I sent yesterday night.

As you said, we have wasted enough time. I hope we can proceed with this soon. I hope all the forms can be completed and mailed back to the bank next week and I also hope that we can issue the attorneys their fees by next week, so they too can start their work.

I hope to hear from you soon. I am going to bed. Thank you for the email.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am now happy with the German claim form

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2023 14:32:29

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for answering my two remaining queries regarding the German claim form. I am now more than happy to fill out the form as you have directed, and to sign my name at the bottom of it.

You mentioned that you thought I was a very inquisitive man. I suppose I am rather meticulous. The devil is in the detail, as they say. I like to be sure that I know what I am doing, rather than simply jump in at the deep end without thinking, as so many people seem to do nowadays. I must thank you for putting up with my punctiliousness, especially at a time when your health is not at its best.

Now then, regarding that document you sent me which you say confirms the death of Mr de Balint. I’m sorry, Mr Muster, but I am absolutely sure that you have sent me the wrong form. I showed the form to my son, Gilbert Jnr, this lunchtime, who has just started learning French in school and therefore has a very basic understanding of the language.

According to Gilbert Jnr, this form looks more like some kind of passport – and a very old passport at that. Apparently it talks about giving the bearer of the document “help and protection”, and requests that the bearer of the certificate should be allowed to “pass and repass freely”. I am sure you will agree, Mr Muster, it doesn’t sound as if the certificate is talking about a dead person. On top of this, my son assures me that there is no mention anywhere on the certificate of a death being confirmed.

You must have sent me the wrong document, Mr Muster. Presumably this was as a result of either the virus that struck down your computer, or of your own ill health. Please examine your files and send me the correct document by return.

Once I receive this document from you, I will complete the claims form and prepare everything to be sent off to the bank.

Just so that I am absolutely sure that I know what I am doing, could you please confirm exactly which documents I need to send to the bank, and reconfirm the address to which I should send them? I have to admit that I deleted the email I received from you which stated the bank’s address, as I was afraid that my computer might catch the same virus as had afflicted your own.

I am going away for the weekend, so please try to get back to me before the end of the day so that I can sort everything out before I leave tonight. Otherwise, I will see to the paperwork first thing on Monday morning.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I am sorry to hear that you do not yet feel ready to find a partner. However, I will do as you ask and trawl through my records to see if I can find any possible matches based on the information – limited although it is – that I currently have about you. The most important thing is your age. Tell me, Mr Muster, how old are you?

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am keen to move forward

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2023 09:37:23

Dear Mr Muster,

I am disappointed not to have received an answer to the email I sent you early on Friday afternoon. I am keen to move forward with this business, and I do not want it to be delayed any further: that virus that infected your computer and you sending me the wrong document has delayed us more than enough already.

Perhaps your delay in responding is a result of your current illness. I do hope that you are feeling better. If not, please endeavour to raise yourself from your sick bed and get back to me by return, confirming exactly which documents I need to send to the bank, along with the bank’s address. Please also advise me what I should do about this death certificate business: you have definitely sent me the wrong document.

I expect to receive an answer from you before the end of the day.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I believe you also mentioned that these attorneys you have found require payment in advance. We need to speak about that: seeing as you have invested so much of your own money into this business already, I think I may be able to help us out there.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I am keen to move forward

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2023 12:50:03 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email(s).

I am sorry that I have not been able to respond to your emails as I do regularly, as I have been a little down and my health is just getting better.

I spent my whole Saturday in the clinic getting injections. I will try and respond to your email more frequently this week, as I would like us to make headway before the weekend and move on to conclude the transfer of the assets as soon as we possibly can.

I now understand your point. I guess I must have sent you the wrong document (ie the death certificate), as I remember the document that you speak of. But at this junction, there is a little problem as I have deleted it from my computer when I got heave that there was a virus in my computer. I would not have wanted this document to get into the wrong hands, so I had it deleted as I could not quarantine the virus, and at that point it had already infected the folder in which the virus was stored.

Not to worry, we will proceed as planned and what I will do is to contact Mr de Balint Jnr’s attorneys and get another copy. After I get the copy, I will provide it to the attorney that will be working for us and he will submit it to the bank on the first meetings with the bank.

I guess we can proceed, and what you have to do now is to get the completed claim form and the completed power of attorney sent to the bank. You will have to also include a copy of your passport or driver’s licence for identification purposes with the bank.

All the completed forms should be sent back to the bank directly at the following address:

Banca Unione di Credito, Piazza Dante 7, PO Box 2861, CH 6901 Lugano, Schweiz, Switzerland

Also, I don’t know how you can help with the attorneys’ fees? They request 2,850 Euros in service fees and they say we have to pay full fees in advance. Will you be able to handle payment of the fees in full? Kindly let me know soon.

I will try and get in touch with Mr de Balint Jnr’s attorneys right now and I will give you a feedback later today.

Do let me know with regards to the attorneys’ fees. I will give you an update later today.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have an idea

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2023 14:51:38

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am terribly sorry to hear that you are still unwell, my dear fellow. How dreadfully inconvenient for you. I trust that your injections – whatever they are – are having the desired effect and that your health returns to normal before too long.

You said that you were “a little down”. Do you mean by this that you are suffering from depression? I have read that electric shock therapy can be extremely beneficial in treating depression. Perhaps you should consider signing up for a course of treatment once we have completed this transaction. Alternatively, you might like to try thinking of happy things, such as birds, trees and blue skies. I’d give that a try before the electrotherapy if I were you. After all, thinking happy thoughts is probably a lot less painful than having 240 volts of electricity directed into your cranial cavity.

But enough of these pleasantries. Regarding the late Mr de Balints’ death certificate, I am pleased to hear that the fact that you sent me the wrong document need not delay us. It is a good job I noticed that you had sent me a completely unrelated document: no doubt the bank would have dismissed my claim out of hand if I had sent them that ancient passport and attempted to pass it off as a Yugoslavian death certificate. Kindly ensure that no similar errors occur as we move forward with this transaction, Mr Muster. Precision and attention to detail. That’s what we need from now on.

Now then, about these attorneys. Of course I will be able to help out with the legal fees: don’t worry about that. However, I have to say that these attorneys you have found do seem to be rather on the expensive side.

I was wondering whether it would be worth me getting my own lawyer, Welsby, involved in this business? He’s a fine lawyer, and very well-respected in Lincolnshire legal circles. He also charges extremely reasonable fees.

Welsby’s got the sharpest legal brain I’ve ever come across. He proved invaluable the other year after an unfortunate incident in which I unwittingly signed up a serial killer onto the books of my introduction agency. It was most distressing for all involved, and not at all good for business: it proved extremely difficult to persuade new people to sign up with the agency when my existing clients’ bodies were being dragged out of Gypping Marsh at the rate of one a week by the local police.

Happily though, Welsby came through for us in the end, despite the multiple claims of corporate negligence: not only did he manage to get all charges against my business dropped, he also persuaded the judge to award us costs against the bereaved families.

I can’t recommend Welsby highly enough. Let me know if you’d like me to contact him, my dear fellow. I am sure he would be able to help us out.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have an idea

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2023 18:40:39 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

When I said I was a little down, I meant I was still feeling unwell and I think it might be the effect of the injections. They are meant to help me rest.

With regards to the idea of involving your attorney in this case, I would say that there are enough reasons to discourage this. As I have told you from the onset, I would like us to keep this transaction in a closed loop, ie between the two of us.

I would think your friend in the legal profession would not approve of this if he knew that this money did not really belong to you and that we are making a false claim, as you are not the real next of kin. Of course, you don’t have to tell him this, but I think if you had that much respect for him, you would let him know what is really going on, and I will not like the situation where it might later slip out and he gets to know and he is then in disagreement and does not want to continue to handle the case.

It would be a terrible tragedy if this happened halfway through the claim. I am not suggesting that it might occur, but my friend Mr Murray, I have known you to be a man who works with his conscience (but really, everybody has one).

For this same reason; I did not get someone I know and trusted for so many years to be the next of kin and I had to reach out to a total stranger and make a new friend.

It would be better for those who would be neutral on this situation to be the ones to handle that case. The attorneys might be expensive, but most Swiss attorneys know what is at stake in the claim of such accounts as the one in our case, and they know that the beneficiaries stand to gain so much, so they use it to their advantage. It’s life.

I think it would be a better idea if we stuck to the original plan I had laid out, and I am sure everything will work out fine and as I planned. I have too much at stake to get things going wrong at the last minute.

I have been in touch with Mr de Balint Jnr’s attorneys and they say they will get a photocopy of the death certificate couriered down to me later this week. I will also have a talk to the attorneys to represent us later tomorrow. I will try and get myself together before then, so I can move around. I do feel a lot better and I hope to be at peak performance in a few days.

Let me know when you wish to start the proceedings.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Are you sure I can’t persuade you to give Welsby a try?

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2023 09:56:29

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am pleased to hear that you are not in fact suffering from depression, although I am of course sorry to hear that you are still unwell. What exactly is ailing you, my dear fellow? I only hope that what you say is correct, and that you will be back to peak performance soon.

Are you sure I can’t persuade you to give Welsby a try, Mr Muster? I appreciate what you say about the possibility that Welsby would not approve of this matter, but I really don’t think this would be a problem. Welsby is a man of the world – aren’t we all – and he knows full well when to turn a blind eye to things. Although he is scrupulously honest, he is not averse to bending the letter of the law from time to time when it is in his clients’ interest to do so.

Welsby moves through the twists and turns of the legal jungle with the skill and finesse of a lithesome leopard clad in lycra. Going from my past experiences of dealing with him, I really do think he would be the ideal man to represent us in this case. And I am sure it would save us some money.

What do you say, Mr Muster? Shall I get in touch with him and ask him to swing into action on our behalf?

I am pleased to hear that you will be receiving a copy of the late Mr de Balint’s death certificate later this week. I look forward to receiving a copy of it from you as soon as it is in your hands.

Do let me know about Welsby as soon as you can so that I know whose name to fill in on the power of attorney form you sent me.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Are you sure I can’t persuade you to give Welsby a try?

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2023 12:34:34 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

You are a very persistent/persuasive man. One thing you have to realise is that if saving money was my priority in this transaction, I would have given up the option when Mr de Balint requested for $100,000 to get a copy of the death certificate from his attorneys.

One thing a lot of people will like to do is to spend very little money on a business and expect to gain a lot. It’s the normal thing these days. You do have to realise that the Swiss attorneys are relatively very expensive, but they are the best at what they do.

They handle a lot of cases like ours regularly, and there are many people out there who have deceased relatives or loved ones who held Swiss bank accounts and I can assure you that if you ask a lot of them, 75% of these people use Swiss attorneys for the claims on their inheritance.

You have to give it a thought. Would you ask a UK banker to take care of your wealth or money in a Swiss jurisdiction or when you are thinking about evading taxes? I think not. Of course, you would ask a Swiss banker or other relative offshore bankers.

Needless to say, it is very normal for you to contact those who you think are best for the job, but you also have to consider the fact that you also have to give the job to those who know more about that field.

I have carefully thought of everything before I sent my proposal over to you. I will need you to stay with my plan. If finances are what you are worried about, please let me know. I would not like you to give me the impression that you have the finances to pay for the legal services and consultances, when really you don’t have that much funds on you. Mr Murray, it will be a real waste of time if it came to that.

What I need to know is, can you handle the payment of the attorneys’ fees?

Mr Murray, we are running round in circles and I will like us to make headway on this claim before this week runs out.

One more thing, the copy of the death certificate will be sent to the attorneys handling the case, and if you require a copy, I will send one over to you. But you will be sending over the forms and power of attorney to the bank without a copy present. I don’t know when I will be able to get the copy in my hands and I will not like us to delay the submission of the forms because of this.

I don’t mean to sound rude, but please stay on track with the original plan.

The name of the attorney to fill out on the power of attorney is the name of the representative I gave you with the INSAD SA legal firm.

I wait on your response and go ahead informing me when you have completed all the forms.

Do keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Let us use the attorney that you suggest then

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2023 13:47:18

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I must admit, you made some salient points regarding our choice of attorney.

You too are a very persistent and persuasive man. So much so, in fact, that I have been swayed by your arguments. Let us do as you suggest, and move forward with the attorney you recommended in the first place.

I am rather busy with work this afternoon, but I will do my best to fill out the forms tonight and get them off in the post to the bank first thing in the morning. I trust that this will be satisfactory.

On another matter, you asked me to look through my records and try to find a suitable partner for you. As you have not yet told me your age, I have had to make an educated guess: given that you told me that you have retired from working at the bank, would I be right in thinking that you are in your late 60s or early 70s?

Assuming this to be the case, I have a charming old dear called Gladys on my books who may be just right for you. Gladys is 76 years old. She has been living on her own for the past seven years (since her husband died) and is now looking for a man for friendship, companionship, cribbage, and possibly romance. Gladys enjoys knitting and listening to the radio, and is reasonably well-preserved for her age: she tells me that she still has most of her own teeth.

What do you think, Mr Muster? Would you be interested in exchanging information with Gladys? Do let me know and I will make the necessary arrangements.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Let us use the attorney that you suggest then

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2023 18:09:29 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am glad that you see things my way. I have thought things out very carefully and I have also tried to cover all loops that might not make this deal go through. That is why I am very persistent that we do things the way I have planned it out. Mind you, it took me a good number of months to get this whole deal in phase.

The next step is to complete all the forms and the power of attorney that I sent over and mail them to the bank soonest. Also, don’t forget to include a copy of your passport or driver’s licence with these documents. The bank will require a form of identification.

Also I will like to know when it would be most suited for you to make transfer of the attorneys’ fees? I think it will be best to make the payment of the attorneys’ fees this week. I will like things to work like the clock (every piece fitting into the other at the right time).

I will also have to meet with Mr Ihdle (sic) also to get all payment details, but first I need to know if it will be convenient for you to make the transfer of the fees sometime this week.

One last thing, I am just a little over 55; precisely, I am 57 years old and I think Gladys is a little too old for me.

Someone in the age range of 40-50 will do just OK. Let me know if you have any openings.

Let me know with regards to the attorneys’ fees and when you send out the forms.

Keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have completed the forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2023 09:23:25

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. You will be pleased to hear that I have completed the forms and that they are now ready to be sent off to the bank. All I need to do is to pop into town and visit the library in order to photocopy my passport, then I can get the forms in the post. I will do that this morning.

You said in your last email that you were going to be meeting up with someone called “Mr Ihdle”. Who is this? I thought we were going to keep the details of this business strictly between ourselves and your chosen attorney (and the evil, drug-smuggling Mr de Balint Jnr, of course). What does this Mr Ihdle have to do with anything?

Now then, Mr Muster, I am going to be perfectly honest with you. I have to tell you that I am rather annoyed with you. I went to a lot of trouble to try and match you up with your ideal partner, but thanks to the extremely limited information you gave me – you didn’t even give me your age until yesterday – it appears that all my hard work has been wasted.

If you had filled in the questionnaire I sent to you the other week, I would have had a much better idea of your personality and of the type of woman you are looking for, and I wouldn’t have wasted so much of my time searching through my records for an older woman as a result. On top of this, Gladys is going to be so disappointed.

This simply won’t do, Mr Muster. I am a busy man, and I am not prepared to waste any more of my valuable time simply because you can’t be bothered to spend five minutes filling in a simple form. I still have a large number of women between 40 and 50 on my books – the unfortunate events of last year not withstanding – and in order to have some chance of success in finding you the perfect partner, I must insist that you fill in that questionnaire and send it back to me at once. I will then be able to carry out a more detailed search based on your own criteria, rather than flapping around in the dark as I have been forced to do up to now.

Kindly fill in the questionnaire and send it back to me by return. I expect to receive it from you later today.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have posted those forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2023 17:10:17

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just returned from town, where I visited the library and photocopied my passport. I then posted off the German claim form, the power of attorney and the photocopy of my passport to the bank.

I would appreciate it if you could deal with the points I raised in my previous email as a matter of urgency, then we can make some progress here.

For your information, next Monday is a public holiday here in the UK, and my wife and I are making the most of it by going away for a long weekend. As a result of this, I will be unavailable from Friday lunchtime until Tuesday morning. I trust that this will not be a problem; presumably it will take a few days for the documents to reach the bank in Zurich anyway. However, it would be nice if we could get move this transaction a little further on before the weekend.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

Gilbert did actually post the documents to the bank. However, he neglected to put any postage stamps on the envelope (he doctored it to make it look as if the stamps had fallen off). Hopefully, the scammer will be put to some inconvenience and will have to pay an excess postage charge in order to receive the documents. That’s if they get delivered at all...

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have posted those forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2023 17:29:41 +0100 (BST)

Mr dear friend Mr Murray,

You seem to have forgotten that “Mr Ihde” is the attorney that will be representing our case with the bank.

If you make reference to the email that I sent to you earlier, you will notice that I mentioned this here. If you will also take note, I typed his name wrongly in my last email to you. I would like to believe that this was what caused the misunderstanding. He is the one I am meant to meet with.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Update

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2023 20:29:51 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

I hope you got my last email? Anyway, let me know if you did get it.

I had a little talk with the attorney Mr Ihde and he says that as long as you have sent the forms back to the bank, he can start work on the case ASAP. He also says that he will be leaving for the United States tomorrow till Thursday next week (he has a divorce case to tend to there), but that he will take a look at the case and prepare his papers for the first meeting with the bank next week.

By that time the forms should already be at the bank and the bank officials will have taken a look at them. He says he will contact the bank next week on Tuesday by telephone from the States to inquire whether or not they have the forms, so he can schedule a meeting and present his case.

I asked him about the payment and he says that he will require a cash payment up front (no cheques, he says) before he can start preparing for the meeting with the bank.

I asked him if we could send the payment to him while he is in the States and he has not given me a particular response to this. He says I should see him again tomorrow morning and he will give me a decision with regards to the payment. I will give you a feedback tomorrow morning on this.

Just in case, get the fees ready with you.

Have a good evening.

Regards,

Adrian

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